Mickomushi.

2012-01-08T00:56:00.001+08:00

I'm so happy to know that Miss Chan is back in school(:
Hope to see the teachers next Monday,
And hope that they'll still remember me(:

2012-01-02T18:52:00.001+08:00

2012(:

I'm gonna make this year AWESOME:D

Hope to stay really focused while on studies this year so I can completed tasks fast and good so will have more time to play(:

Work hard, and hopefully, play hard(:

2012 GREAT aim: To snatch as many As as possible for A Levels(:

I know I can do it, watch me(;

2012 SUPER wish: To get A for PW.

I'm seriously worried for it, especially when March is approaching):
I really hope the teachers gave me a super super lenient mark for my Q&A. Let me pass although I know it's quite impossible)':

Pray pray pray pray pray!!!

2011-12-28T16:39:00.000+08:00

Oh yay got a new phone(:

When I thought I'm down on luck, luck strikes me:D

2011-12-25T22:14:00.001+08:00

Lol, Google is getting increasingly creative:D

I recently went to this place which welcome my arrival to this world exactly 17 years and 20 days ago.
I visited the person who carried me into this world with his hands.
The feeling was.. wow. (:

Oh ya!
Did I mentioned that I just dropped my phone ON THE ROAD just now?!
No I didn't.
Did I mentioned that the phone suffered the biggest blow in 1 and a half years such that THE SCREEN CRACKED LIKE #%&@!!!!!!
No I didn't.
I kept jumping up and down in the house and telling everyone at home, "我要疯掉了！！"
OH MY GOSH!!!!!!
Half more year to a new phone.
Sorry my baby):):):):
I need time to recover from this shock seriously.

The feeling when you are watching something so in depth.. and you suddenly realised yourself smiling(:

2011-12-24T22:58:00.000+08:00

Early Merry Christmas!:D

Although there's no celebration for me this year(:

2011-12-22T10:17:00.000+08:00

Before I went to bed last night,
I asked myself,
'What if, I'm going to grow old alone?'

2011-12-18T23:50:00.000+08:00

looking through those presents makes me feel so blessed:D

hope I didn't fail as your friend(:

you all are simply awesome!:D

2011-12-10T22:05:00.001+08:00

those photos really upset me.

2 years really changed a lot of things.

你还记得从前那种感觉吗？

2011-12-02T20:50:00.000+08:00

Hi, I'm back!;D
I'm not supposed to publicize what I'm currently doing right now.
But for those who knows, just to let you know,
IT'S AWESOME!:D
Practical experiences are always the BEST!:D

okay, there's A LOT of homework.
certainly, not enough time to do:X
seriously forgot everything, must start from scratch again:S
Gambete!

Leave some positive footprints in someone's life, even though you two do not know each other.

To make a difference in your life, try making a difference in other's life.

2011-11-14T23:24:00.000+08:00

你觉得今天的一切是我咎由自取？
我的矛盾，我的伤心，又有谁看见？

自从那天起，我就知道，以后不会再像从前那样了。

2011-11-06T16:00:00.000+08:00

Maybe, you belong to the stage.

2011-11-05T21:48:00.001+08:00

All of us had changed.

Sad as it may sound,

but the logical part of me always remind that the memories are what matters.

We should be happy by the fact that we are once happy, together.

我们努力去过各自的日子吧! (:

我要把所有事都做好。

我不要去在意那些看不起我的人。

我要理智。

我要快乐。

2011-11-03T20:38:00.000+08:00

Just some random picture that I had included in my OP ppt(:

Just woke up, saw this message:

" HAI ALL, TMR IS THE 1104'S BIRTHDAY.

LET'S CELEBRATE IT TOGETHER ALRIGHT?

We'll meet @ 12 in room 3-38!

THANK YOU! B-) "

First thought : Huh? We got birthday 1 meh?
Second thought : Mm.. Must have a reason.. Okay what's the date tmr?"
Third thought: Oh tmr's 041111!
Last thought: Lol. I have a cute class. *Smile*

For this, I love my class:D

2011-10-25T23:04:00.003+08:00

I got back my promos papers today.

2011-10-21T23:08:00.000+08:00

Jiawan, you know I'm always here(:

2011-10-17T20:38:00.001+08:00

If you can't live up to the true meaning of charity,
please,
go away.
We don't need you.

Do you know, how many morally decayed people, our society has brought up?
Touch your heart, ask yourself, if you are one of them.

Study, Study, Study.
Is that all you have in your mind?
You may be the best one, so what?
Remember,
NOTHING, gives you the right to look down on people.
NOTHING, gives you the right to mind your own business.
NOTHING, gives you the right to receive but don't reciprocate.

This is not for just a person.
Look into your heart, ask yourself, YOU are the one.

Take and give, this is the cycle.
Don't ever think this is none of your business.
We'll wait and see.

I feel utterly sorry for you.

I really hate to repeat this again.
Academics, does mean something.
However, it's not EVERYTHING.

You may think you are so educated, so intelligent.
But I only have one word for you : Ignorant.

2011-10-15T12:48:00.000+08:00

I just love walking past the Eblouissant..
the wind gently blowing..
The cloudy weather..
And someone on the 3rd floor playing this piece on the piano.
This is what I love about Nanyang(:

I think I will fall in love with a guy who knows how to play the piano(:

2011-10-15T12:08:00.002+08:00

Someone actually said that he love my smile.
Lol.

I have to think of something beautiful, to forget all the pain you had caused me.
I'm going to forget you, totally.

It's just part of growing up. (:

2011-10-14T23:36:00.002+08:00

Lol, glancing through Facebook.
It looks so much more interesting than before somehow(:
And i realized how powerful time is.. in transforming a person.
A big WOW.

I had been making myself a joke the past few months.. Not realizing how far we're drifting apart.
And I thought everything will always remain the same forever, at least between you and me.
Hah, such a naive thought.
Look, how far we had gone, in different directions.
This is how far apart we are right now, get it?
You no longer need me.

I had lost all the faith.

2011-10-13T19:48:00.001+08:00

I watched this today.

We just went to the cinema like that.

No pre-plan.

My very first time watching a movie like that.

You know I really hate watching this type of movie, e.g. X-Man, Iron Man, whatever.

Cause I thought I definitely wont enjoy it.

I'll probably be spending more than half of my time figuring what they're talking about, in addition to the storyline which I always deem as "boring".

But well, everyone decided to go for it, plus today's movie tickets was cheap, no harm trying (:

So I went in..

AND ENJOYED IT!

It was exciting, funny, heartwarming.

At some point, my heart was beating so freaking fast, other times I was laughing so loudly.

And in the end, I cried.

Plus, I actually understand 95% of their English!

Lol, I think I had started falling in love with American English.

It sounded just so lovely(:

And I realised my English isnt that bad actually(:

5 popcorns for it, definitely(:

I believe, today will be the day, I start watching this type of movie.

2011-10-12T22:21:00.000+08:00

I only want my friends who are really close to me to know that I have a blog.
'cause there're a lot of things that I wrote..
you'll misinterpret the meaning very easily if you dont know me well enough.

For example, I do write A LOT of negative stuffs here, but that doesnt mean I'm a very negative person.
A very big NO.
Sometimes, it's just some thoughts that suddenly come across my mind and I wanna share.
If you really know me, you'll know what I mean right now, right? (:
Haha:P

2011-10-12T18:15:00.004+08:00

:DDD

"An alarm clock which will only switch off if you smile at it. A genius and potentially catastrophically annoying concept by Kim Jungwoo.

This is actually super cute and a great idea :) Do want."

I actually went Apps Store to find this app.

Lol, can't find.

Alright, actually I dont really want to post such sad stuff today.

but this picture is really so true, especially for people like me.

Promos ended.

Had a haircut.

Like seriously, 4 inch just gone like that:S

I actually harbour the thought to really cut it short.

but I didnt though(:

going for charity walk tmr:D

Results . CCA . ProjectWork .

Omg dont want to think:X

2011-10-08T17:39:00.004+08:00

“For Steve, it was all about living life on his own terms and not wasting a moment with things he didn’t think were important. He was aware that his time on earth was limited. He wanted control of what he did with the choices that were left.”

At one point, Mr. Jobs was asked by the Microsoft founder Bill Gates to give a majority of his wealth to philanthropy alongside a number of prominent executives like Mr. Gates and Warren E. Buffett. But Mr. Jobs declined, according to a person with direct knowledge of Mr. Jobs’s decision.

As news of the seriousness of his illness became more widely known, Mr. Jobs was asked to attend farewell dinners and to accept various awards.

He turned down the offers. On the days that he was well enough to go to Apple’s offices, all he wanted afterward was to return home and have dinner with his family. When one acquaintance became too insistent on trying to send a gift to thank Mr. Jobs for his friendship, he was asked to stop calling. Mr. Jobs had other things to do before time ran out.

“He was very human. He was so much more of a real person than most people know. That’s what made him so great.”

____________________________________________________________________________

“Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.”
-Steven P. Jobs

2011-10-06T17:34:00.000+08:00

I heard Steve Jobs passed away this morning.
I really hate knowing people that i know passed away.
Although they dont know me and we're not related in any way, I still have that pinch of sadness within me.
Rest in peace.
and really thanks for that great creation(:

You know, I have been giving myself a lot of self counselling sessions nowadays.

Of course, about getting retained and all that stuff, so that I wont over react by too much when I get my results.

Especially every time I walked out from the exam, knowing that I dont have the confidence to pass that particular paper.

I had also did some self evaluation: What's making me so scared about getting retained?

And I realised a very important answer: I'm simply afraid that people will look down on me.

Remember the first day I stepped into the class and realised that there's 3 retainees in the class, I must really admit that I had thrown a weird look on them.

Because I had always been in an environment where there's no retainees, there're only people who have always been fighting for the top position.

In my dictionary at that point of time, retain = plain laziness.
But as time passes by, the definition had changed greatly.
And now, I'm actually the one facing this crisis.
Maybe it's just karma: I once looked down on people, and they're going to look down on me too.

3 more papers to go.

I guessed much of the results had been fixed.

Nevertheless, I must have the courage to face everything when it really comes.

No choice(:

Be brave.

2011-09-29T12:39:00.000+08:00

another dropped out of school.
yeah, jc is just like that.
through grades, one gave up after another.
and the good ones are left to compete among themselves.
this makes the competition even harder to go on.
people are just being filtered out one by one.

really fear the day comes when i realised i had been filtered out.

when i see people study hard now, especially those who dont used to do that, i feel really scared.
because i know this increases the chance of me getting retained, although the chances are high enough.
and im actually still not sure whether my method of studying is really working or not.
maybe it has just been wrong all this while.

nevertheless, jc is never a regret, promised.
i actually dont think i'll do better if i were in poly now.
if i am going to be on the retain list, i'll probably just carry on, instead of getting a transfer.
everything is just a result of me wasting my time and not studying hard enough.
jc is all about self discipline, a lot a lot of it.
and people either get encouraged or demoralised.

i dont know.
nobody knows.
and it's going to start tomorrow.
do your best.

2011-09-16T21:00:00.000+08:00

今天，在妈妈怀里哭了。

很伤心，但却庆幸得到了那一刻最需要的安慰。

I was browsing through my contact list.

and found a number which belongs to a person that dont exist anymore.

my heart skipped a beat, and i deleted it.

Today, is so not a good day.

2011-09-15T22:42:00.000+08:00

爱得那么深，要放手时一定很痛。

很久没哭了。

2011-09-15T22:33:00.001+08:00

To a friend:

Oh man, I really feel super upset because I think I really look like I doesnt care.
Hope you understand that I'm just a very inner person.
I do care a lot, though.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

2 more weeks, pray that I'll clear it safely.

2011-09-11T10:24:00.000+08:00

"For the people who were going to work that morning, they might have had those same thoughts-when I retire, I am going to do this - those people never had that chance."

"Those 200 people, they knew they were facing death, there's no way escaping it. They simply just chose the way they want it to be."

4 civilian airplanes, 19 hijackers, more than 2500 innocent deaths.
so this is what you want. Is it?

If I'm feeling like this right now, then how about those millions of people?

2011-08-20T23:43:00.000+08:00

我最近和生离死别好像很近。
坦然面对，我还做不到。

2011-08-19T22:57:00.000+08:00

oh man, felt so heartbroken again):

yeah, I flunked it as expected.

You know, I realized,

when someone is irritating you so much that you cant really stand it anymore but you are still acting so calm and cool about it although you know that it's boiling inside,

it really shows how far apart you two are..

despite how close you two seem to be.

but i still appreciate them. Thanks.

42 days, still counting down.

Whenever i walk past and saw the board with the numbers changing everyday,

....................

2011-08-15T19:00:00.001+08:00

love this picture a lot.

tells you a lot of things if you think about it.

browsing through the letters again.

i think it's difficult to have such sweet friends again.

but i realised, there are some letters that i dont want to touch anymore.

i hope they dont even exist in the 1st place.

2011-08-13T17:40:00.000+08:00

quoted from someone's fb post:

Never hold people too close t your hearts. Because people change, and then they leave. Even after all the 'I'd never leave you' promises. Less love, less hurt. (':

i still dont really feel like talking today.

but i believe time will heal everything.

~~like how it healed the wounds you had caused me.~~

I just remembered that i had long forgotten this phrase:

SMILE, everything's going to be alright(:

2011-08-12T23:49:00.000+08:00

I really really really really totally feel like crying now.
Life's so fragile.
One moment she's here, smiling.
The next moment she's gone, forever.
And you still feel that the previous memory you have of her is still so fresh in your mind.

I'm really sorry.
No amount of words can describe how sorry I'm feeling right now.

I really don't know what to say at this moment.

2011-08-09T19:27:00.002+08:00

Here I am again(:

Happy Birthday, Singapore.

Happy Birthday, my home, my love.

Really wish i could have the NDP tickets):

2011-08-08T23:01:00.000+08:00

and forget about the rest.

lol.

sometimes you think it matters.

but actually, it doesnt.

Give a stranger one of your smiles, it may be the only sunshine he sees for the whole day.

i'll promise to become that happy girl again, after so much rubbish i went through(;

cheer for me.

2011-08-07T21:15:00.000+08:00

2011-07-31T23:31:00.000+08:00

我已分不清谁真谁假。
我不要再当一个“真”人了，
因为每次受伤的只有我。

大家都戴着面具，他们不累吗？
或许只是自我保护罢了。

2011-07-30T11:24:00.004+08:00

Just to let you know that I'm still alive.

2011-07-24T10:51:00.000+08:00

我好像是一个容易被遗忘的人。

how sad..

:'(

2011-07-22T23:01:00.000+08:00

wahh cannot watch 家好月圆..
everytime when i watch it, i'll get super angry at that bad bad woman and then in the end get so touched until i start crying)':

2011-07-22T22:54:00.001+08:00

家

这个字对你来说是什么？

回家

在你心里有什么意义？

你曾仔细想过吗？

你知道对多少人来说，

回家，有多么困难吗？

回家的路，有多么遥远？

要不要回家，已经不是他们能够轻易决定的事情。

他们没有选择，

但为什么我们，这些有权利选择的人，又那么想要离开？

为什么？

在家里等待你回家的人，他们呢？

自私。

2011-07-18T23:05:00.001+08:00

i suddenly forgot the name of this movie.

but it's super SUPER touching.

i still feel like crying whenever i think of it.

that man, tried everything with all his might, just to preserve the memory of his late wife.

To him, that's EVERYTHING.

omg, i so sad now suddenly :'(

2011-07-18T22:51:00.001+08:00

im tired, but much more motivated.

"you all like this class right?

you all enjoy one another's company right?

i dont think you all want to come back to class next year and realise that it has shrunk, right?

im sure you all dont want to spend another year to start all over when you can spend it better somewhere else right?

...

i really hope i dont lose any single one of you again.."

i cant believe the teacher i used to dislike the most and thought i will continue to dislike him until i leave the school said something that touched my heart deeply today.

i always thought he doesnt care.

ya, maybe he does, but only for his reputation sake.

but today, i realised, i think im wrong.

I'm glad i care.

2011-07-16T20:51:00.003+08:00

this is from jiesi's blog..

What about the person that has to find your body, surrounded by blood?
What about the terror and pain that they’ll have to remember for the rest of their lives?
What about them having to feel guilty for being “too late” every day of their lives?
What about them holding your body and screaming in agony as they can’t even get the strength to leave you to get a phone to call for help?
What about the depression that you’ll leave them in?
What about them having to walk away, their clothes soaked in your blood and their tears?
What about them yelling at your paralytic body “Please live! I love you! I need you! Please.”?
What about all the tears you’ll cause people that you aren’t even aware of?

Life is so fragile, and we fight for it every day —even against our own hands.
When you kill yourself, you’re also becoming a muderer.
You’re killing pieces of the people who love you.
You’re tearing holes into their hearts that can’t even seal with time.
So what about them?

i know during that period of time,
whenever i said about ending my life,
i know her heart skipped a beat.
i know she very much wants to stop my thought, but she cant.
i know she wants to help me, but at the same time, felt helpless.
i know i'm threatening her.
i know it all.

i'm sorry.

2011-07-16T20:45:00.000+08:00

stop laughing at me.

you look down on me,

and i'm going to prove you wrong.

we'll wait and see.

2011-07-14T20:58:00.000+08:00

i am very very very tired right now.. both physically and mentally.

i will persevere.

watch me grow.

2011-07-10T13:30:00.000+08:00

you told me before..

whenever you feel like burying your face into your hands and cry,

put both your hands together, you'll see a mouth smiling to you.
believe it or not, it's there to tell you that everything will be alright..

我希望，我们还可以一起拥有很多个十年... 真的。

2011-07-06T18:59:00.002+08:00

1st time in my life,
i struggled so so hard..
just to hold my tears back when i saw my exam paper.
thought i have prepared for the worst.
but no, i nearly lost control of my emotions in a lecture threatre with 200 people around me.
i dont need encouragement, a scolding, or a word of concern.
just give me some space to reflect, right now.

it's a dream, and i have to wake up now.

it's a depressing day.

2011-07-04T21:18:00.001+08:00

i went ice skating today:D

im going to start life afresh, from tomorrow onwards.

2011-07-03T10:16:00.001+08:00

okay, these are taken from yahoo.
sudddenly very lazy to upload the ones i took there:P
the night view of the front building with all the lights on is prettier(:
the train service has stopped):
maybe the railways and the station are going to be demolished too):
history is going to be deleted physically.. to make way for the development of the modern world.
i think the train station is still open for public to go in and take photos.
so if you dont want to miss the chance, please visit:D

im always telling my mum that i want to take the train since young.
and she's always refusing me.
and now i finally got the chance.
ironically, it's my one, only and last time.

and my bro was like saying that usually, people wont take the train cause it's slow and blah blah blah.
then suddenly when it was announced that the train service will be stopped, everyone flocked there.
most people like me, even took the trouble to go into malaysia just to take the train ride.
people only cherish things when it's about to be gone, regret their actions when it's too late.

it's kind of sad actually):
im used to growing up looking at trains and walking past the railway tracks.
when it's near evening, the the train will always pass by that same spot..
then all the cars and human crossing must wait for the train to "cross the road", lol.
that "i think it's very nice" train bridge i always see..
the track and sometimes trains i will see when i go that coffee shop for dinner..
i still remember me standing at that spot looking at the train passing by in my primary school.
then i was like pointing at it, and telling my friends, "hey train! train!", lol.
everything will go into history.
they're not going to happen anymore.
in the future, people will only remember that there's only something called "MRT".

2011-06-29T19:59:00.001+08:00

i think it should be... "to move on, you must keep your balance..."

on graduation day last year, you told me, "dont think so much, dont stress."
this year when i went back, you told me, "you seemed to look a lot happier now(:"

2011-06-26T10:00:00.000+08:00

Could Singapore have come this far without the government?

It was a question President S R Nathan posed on Friday.
Asked to comment on the upcoming Presidential Election, he said, "One of the things, we must remember, is that with all these gripes that you hear, people forget how we have arrived to this stage in our country. Could it have been done without the government?"
"Much has been achieved. There are probably faults, (and) they have to be remedied," acknowledged President Nathan. "But we just can't distance ourselves from the government."

-Yahoo

agree.
i <3 Singapore.
im thankful to the government.
this is my stand.

2011-06-22T23:27:00.002+08:00

2 more days to end of holidays:(:(:(:(:(
if there isnt exams, i think i'll be glad to return to school.
really realised that i prefer homework to studying.
cause i dont really know how to study alreadyT.T

what's wrong with blogger.. cannot upload image again-.-

2011-06-21T21:43:00.004+08:00

那些选择自杀的人，
他们根本没有意愿去解决问题，
他们甚至没有勇气去面对问题。
他们觉得最惨的是自己，
其实最糟糕的是他们身边的人，
他们必须承受失去亲人的痛。
那种痛，是无法想像的。
只有弱者才会选择自杀。

-From TV.

2011-06-20T13:18:00.003+08:00

very lousy quality

0.3 megapixels:/

yup, "researching" a lot on SNSD nowadays

not because i'm very into this k pop business nowadays

just curious about their history only actually

from auditions, to trainees, to pop stars

their history is pretty interesting though.

i think a lot of people ( including me) will wow to know how much hard work they had put in and how much hardships they had gone through in order to become who they are now.

i have always wondered why they can dance so perfectly and uniformly as a group.

and i got my answer now.

the way Koreans train their stars is really.. strict.

now, i finally understood why there're so many Korean stars who used the word "hard" to describe their process of becoming a star and why there are so many who contracted depression and committed suicide.

it's all due to the immense stress and pressure they're facing, not only from the entertainment industry, but also from the outside world

The disapproval and sarcasm they're getting, just because they chose to become an entertainer.

frankly speaking, i used to dislike SNSD a lot :/

then i came across this newspaper article yesterday.

totally caught me in surprise.

ex-fuhuanite becoming k pop star.

w-o-w.

then below that is a daily timetable of their trainee period and menu of their meals.

even more wow.

sure can lose a lot of weight during their trainee period:S

and i think i have some impression of that girl actually..

good luck to her(:

oh by the way, i finally cleared my tagboard.

ban some people, sorry if it's you :X

hope those advertisements can stop.

2011-06-15T00:31:00.002+08:00

Shi Ting, start studying.

2011-06-12T09:59:00.000+08:00

i wanna be a happy girl who'll always give her best in whatever she does;
a happy girl who'll stop caring so much about other's viewpoint of her;
a happy girl who leaves no regrets in her life.
because by doing so, she can then be a happy girl.

2011-06-07T20:59:00.002+08:00

每个人都是生活的导演。

2011-06-05T19:47:00.000+08:00

looking through the letters and cards again.
they never failed to make me smile whenever i browsed through them(:
felt so blessed.
and i guessed i'll never get sick looking at it.
because every letter, every card, clearly reflected efforts put in, no matter how little they might be.
and i really thank these people who put in the efforts(:
thank you!:D

hope i will never lose the letters and cards.
i'll be fun browsing through them when im 50(:
sec school is nice(:
guessed i wouldnt be receiving much of such things from JC onwards:S

2011-06-05T00:31:00.001+08:00

Missing..

mm.

missing the times when we're still a 4E5 sitting in that classroom having bio lessons.

they're not going to come back.
but everything is rewinding in my mind..

2011-06-03T22:30:00.000+08:00

national library is really wow.
and pw is not really fun:X
but i think im starting to find the interesting part about it:P

2011-06-03T18:13:00.003+08:00

2011-06-01T13:10:00.000+08:00

im so happy today cause bio is cancelled:D
and chem tmr is also postponed(:

i just love rotting at home:D
okay, i know i need to start my work soon:X

2011-05-29T23:27:00.001+08:00

MY JC LIFE-NANYANG<3

RSLE BATAM :D

Preparations

Team Nanyang

Hotel(Very Nice!:D)

Orphanage:

Library(Before)

although it looks pretty neat but dont judge a book by its cover:/

Sorting of books:

The Library People+their end product :D

i really salute them(:

The library is really hot, stuffy, dirty and anything bad you can imagine:S

The Teaching People:

Drawing Session:

Balloon Sculpturing Session:

i know how to do balloon sculpturing liao!!:D

and finally, my dearest PAINTING TEAM<3

ShuYi and Delvyn!!

HAHA i think one of the most wonderful thing about this trip is knowing them!!:D

really miss all the chatting sessions with my dear roommate, shuyi(: and all the talk crap and laughing sessions with delvyn(:

haha want to say sorry to delvyn(although i know you wont be seeing this:P), i used to think you are those very noisy and irritating guy(actually you really are:X), but thanks for bringing me and the team so much laughter and joy:D and i think you are a very loyal friend too:D

i look very ugly here:S but i think that's the only group photo of the painting team:X

Another ugly photo of mine:X

But this is to show that i really contributed and did work:P

Lastly, presenting to you, painting team's fruit of labour and another RSLE group photo:D

A very fond memory to remember about JC(:

FILMFEST:D

kay no more photos cause the whole process is pitch dark in the LT:X

frankly speaking,

when a lot of ppl told me it's not nice before it really started and after i watched the 1st film,

i really felt a tinge of regret:S

cause the 1st film really not very nice:S

but the rest quite nice luh(:

and some are VERY NICE:D

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Father and Mother, I love you.

----> FAMILY<3

this is the film i love the most and the one that left me with great impression.

very very very well done(:

i'm sure that i didnt wasted my 6 bucks:D

and i still feel funny recalling meixu mumbling, "huhhh.. i want cry already... i want cry already.."

haha nice films really touch me and always make me feel like crying:X

1104:D

a nice class actually(:

actually there'll still a lot about JC that's worth recalling(:

like fencing class, PE classes when we played kid's game like catching and H20 and the teacher is okay with it..etc..

i think that maybe i'll even miss the studying part although it's really pretty sucky:X

i really love NY a lot(:

it has a very conducive environment for me to learn and grow.

definitely a good place to spend 2 years in(:

even if i fail to get promoted this year and get myself transferred to poly, i will still love it(:

no regrets, glad to say(:

若真的静下心好好想想，其实自己得到的远远超过自己所失去的。

2011-05-28T22:17:00.001+08:00

如果我能让全世界学会一样东西：

我希望每个人都能懂得如何去爱。。
不只懂得怎么爱自己，也懂得怎么去爱他人。

如果我能让所有人丧失一样本能：

我希望每个人都能忘了怎么计较。。
没了计较，世界就少了一份仇恨，多了一份关怀。

these few days i have been thinking a lot.
a million thoughts ran through my head.
sadly, most of them are negative.
i did not cry, but felt depressed though.
realised that there are a lot of facts that i can't change no mattter what.
i think i really need someone to tell me, "it's okay.. let's move on."

2011-05-26T16:46:00.000+08:00

let go.
or you will never succeed.

2011-05-24T21:18:00.003+08:00

there's something wrong with the music player.
at least stilll can play.
will get it fixed when im free.

and i almost forgot, goong is SUPER NICE!:D
hope to watch it again during the holidays if there's time(:

2011-05-22T22:21:00.000+08:00

i want this dress!(:

2011-05-22T12:41:00.001+08:00

2011-04-19T23:36:00.000+08:00

'when you start singing, you can't stop.'

Mm..
Maybe if there isn't so much pressure,
so much stress,
So much factors to consider and worry about,
I guessed I will never stop singing.

2011-04-18T20:26:00.000+08:00

sometimes it's sort of ironic..
when you used to dislike someone that much, used to complain about him/her..
but you missing him/her right now):

2011-04-17T15:59:00.000+08:00

感谢你曾经毫无保留地和我分享你的一切, 毫无保留地相信我, 关心我..
虽然如今一切都已改变, 我和你也不再像以前那样..

2011-04-16T21:28:00.000+08:00

hello E!:D
hope you'll looking at this before monday(:
okay, finally, the day you're looking forward so much is coming.
it's going to be a brand new start.
new school, new friends, new subject
really hope this is the life you really wanted.
i know you'll work hard, so that's not the part i need to be worried about (:
so yeah, enjoy everything you chose.
re-make new good friends, and of course, dont forget about me hur!
you really gave me good amount of encouragement and comfort when i just started jc, and even now.
so if you ever meet any unhappiness at your new school (touchwood>.<), give me a call or sms.
i promise i'll try my very best to help(:
and keep in contact kay! dont abandon me no matter how great your new friends are.
i'll be jealous:P
hahaha, okay enough of my nonsense here(:
stay good, stay strong(:
you know you have all the support you ever need.
love you!:D:D

okay back to work:X
by looking at my progress now, i'll probably have to burn midnight oil tonight:S
die die must get chemical bonding and functions right.
next week will be full of meetings till 8-9pm, and next weekend i'll be spending at an orphanage in batam.
haha very very busy, especially with the 4 very important tests coming.
but glad that im enjoying everything im doing for the RSLE trip(:
it's gonna be fun, hopefully.

mid yr timetable's out.
teachers said it's very normal if almost everyone fail.
mm, okay then my target shall be to pass everything! lol.
must get out of this college by the end of 2 years!:<
jiayou!:D:D

2011-04-04T19:20:00.003+08:00

seriously, i dont know what i should say about my life now.
it's not too bad, not too good.
im going to school everyday hoping the moment to go home will come fast.
monday waiting for friday
friday hoping weekend goes slower.
friendship wise.. i must say.. im not really satisfied with the status now.
especially for cca, no friends there really makes me dread to go there.
it's especially demoralising when everyone's in cliques.
it's just difficult to join in.
study wise, im not really euthu about it.
but at least i'll get what needs to done to done when it's due.
test results, still able to make it but can do better.
im so uncertain about my future.
it's just like me waiting for days to pass slowly.
one day, two days, three days..
i just dont want to be too bad.
it'll be bonus if i done well.
haii, i think im in exactly the same state as when i first entered fuhua in sec 1
my adaptation skills is really the worst of the worse.
and it hasnt become better as the age increases.
how long does it need for me to feel really comfortable with jc life?
half a year? it has been a quarter already:S
i guessed friends are really important figures in school life.
i just cant have the drive to be passionate about everything without real good friends.
or am i expecting too much?
i realised im too dependent on friends.
omg, that's bad):

mood nowadays: okay lor. haii.

missing the past again.

im still hanging on there. hope i stay strong.

2011-04-03T19:40:00.002+08:00

2011-04-02T19:05:00.002+08:00

there's no turning back
by hook or by crook i must make it.
MUST.

2011-03-27T14:00:00.002+08:00

the past days for me wasnt great for me:X

there's a lot of stuffs bothering me.
reality's harsh.
people are complicated creatures.
i couldnt let go.
but well, maybe it's time to move on.
是时候该开始充实地面对生活了.
only those who can really focus on their aims can make their dreams come true.
some things are just not worth bothering so much.. yes.

2011-03-20T17:20:00.000+08:00

O.O
heels.

girls' best friend(:

smiling is the best expression humans can ever have.

2011-03-20T11:06:00.002+08:00

O.O blogger stats is cool man haha.

mm. this looks cool.

and it sounds meaningful to me actually.

although i later realised that it's just bmw's advertisement.

lol.

2011-03-17T20:11:00.000+08:00

need to cheer myself up in order to forget some things right now.
i actually want to share it here.
but nevermind, it's not something lighthearted.

forgive and forget.
afterall, when you really face a real situation, it's absolutely difficult to put the words to use.

2011-03-17T12:06:00.000+08:00

mm, i doubt what's stated above actually.
but i totally agree with number 15.
even if no one tells you how great you are to them, take time to tell those who meant a lot to you that they are important.
because you know the feeling of being told like that.
you know it can make a difference.

2011-03-14T20:47:00.000+08:00

you know, once i thought that even if 2012 is approaching,
i wouldnt be scared nor afraid.
i always have that mindset that since it's coming and we couldnt prevent it, there should be nothing to be scared about.
it'll be just that 1 sec of traumatism and everything will be gone..
me, you, and everything.
and i thought i will always feel this way, till the day really comes.
but now,
i regretted.

japan, india, chile, new zealand, haiti and the endless count.
it's not kidding anymore.
it's going to come.

watched this two videos.
have that sudden feel of helplessness.
sudden urge to cry.

i keep worrying about my future.
but suddenly, i really feel i have no future anymore.
if the world is going to end like that, why am i bothering to worry so much about things that is going to happen in the future when there's no more future.
no future, nothing will happen.
dont bother to worry, dont bother to dream.
do your best now and take one step at a time.

are we sure that the past will always be past tense?
if i were to given a chance to live back my past again, i wouldnt want it.
let it be.
let the happy memories always stay as memories and the lessons be learnt.
i dont want to repeat anything anymore..
neither the memories nor the lessons.

2011-02-23T20:25:00.006+08:00

my civics tutor said, " once you're here, dont think of another path anymore. dont tell yourself that you should have gone into a poly or you should have chosen something else. just focus on what you have now and do well. do your best, do really well and continue with your life."

there're indeed a lot of times that i start to ponder what will happen if i had chosen a poly path.

when i face unhappiness and setbacks in jc,

i will start thinking if life will be as "bad" as now if i were in a poly.

and a lot of times, i will doubt myself for choosing this particular path.

i actually felt uneasy when i was going to buy the uniforms.

im afraid i'll regret, im afraid i'll say i want poly at the last minute.

i keep giving myself a false impression that i can turn back whenever i want.

i'll even feel uneasy just by looking at the word "nanyang junior college" that's printed on worksheets and notes.

because all these while, i had nearly confirmed that i'll be seeing "ngee ann polytechnic" instead.

but when i start settling down, start wearing the uniform everyday and familiarising myself with the faces in school, i had gradually realised that there's no turning back anymore..

that im going to spend my next 2 years here(provided that i dont get retained)

i dont know about other schools, but nanyang usually scare their students with harsh facts and reality 1st.

for instance, i have a nice principal but he'll retain you as long as he thinks you should be.
that means no allowance.
that's why ny have a longer list of retainees than some other jcs
that's good luh, rather than staying in your lalaland and getting retained in the end.

i must work hard.
work hard.
work hard.
(although im still in some of the holiday slacking mood even till now:S)

做人要往前看，但那不代表你得遗忘过去。
把过去当作教训，当作学习，再次出发。
切忌耿耿于怀..

saw this when i was researching for my gp
thought it's interesting
makes you think actually.
yes, we have to admit that we're weaker.

2011-02-21T19:35:00.003+08:00

i love her seriously<3

it's difficult not to smile and become cheery whenever i see her, even if im in 1 of the worst mood at that time.

she just simply gives a very sunny and positive image.

and im sure many ppl who knows her will agree with me.

like even if the sky is going to fall the very next moment, she'll still be a happy girl(:

i'll always miss the times when i used to send her a depressing sms saying that im feeling lousy at that moment, and the next moment when her reply comes in, i'll immediately break into a smile.

i just love to depend on her, and i am 100% sure that she's a loyal buddy that i can always depend on whenever i need to.

even though im still skeptical on the "best friends forever" theory,

but if possible, i want us to stay like that forever.

can we?

i realised that blogs should be selectively read.

i found out that reading some ppl's blog will make my mood drop dramastically all of a sudden,

while some other ppl's blog makes me hopeful and remained cheery after reading it.

for instant, i think my blog shouldnt be 1 that you should be reading.

cause i usually come here to rant and rant and rant.

to release my inner feelings that i usually do not express it out.

i like the feeling of blogging and i want to keep it personally, or maybe, only to share it with certain close friends.

i think only they will bother to come.

at least i know some who used to read my blog on a frequent basis.
i dont know if they do it now.

i dont think so actually:X

nevermind, i dont mind keeping it this way.

dear blog, even if nobody bothers to come anymore, i wont ignore you(:

oh anyway, fyi, i myself is a frequent reader and visitor of certain blogs.

so if you're 1 blogger who thinks nobody is reading what you're writing, maybe you're wrong.

afterall im not those type of ppl who'll leave a comment at the tagboard everytime i visit blogs.

okay, time to start my PI:S

im pretty surprised that some people actually are done with it when i havent even started brainstorming on what to do yet:X

2011-02-17T20:27:00.001+08:00

i think im settling down.
think.

let me quote something from the handbook..
"Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.-Swedish Proverb"
exactly.

it's friday again tmr:D
im so excited in meeting my old buddies again over the weekend(:

2011-02-14T19:21:00.003+08:00

whenever i see this photo now, i'll feel like crying.
i want to be like the girl.
just hide in the blanket, in her comfort zone.
totally hate this fact that everyone will be forced to grow up eventually.

kay, im still trying to adapt to the new school.
i shall not use the word struggling beause i feel the situation now is better than when i 1st entered fuhua
but im still trying to make myself comfortable with the environment, the system, and the people.
whenever im stucked in this kind of situation, i'll yearn for the past.
unrealistic idea yeah? i cant help but to do that.
today, i walked the same path home.
平时，眼开，心没开。
今天，眼开，心也开了。

i saw that old me standing at that particular spot every morning.
i saw jiesi walking down the side of the carpark to meet me, her brother tagging along behind.
then we walked to school together.

i saw that motorcycle parking lot.
where my neighbour would always park his motorcycle there.
and sometimes when i come out of the lift, i would see him standing there beside his motorcycle, preparing to go to work.

i saw that seat at the void deck.
where my mum and i used to be sitting there, waiting for my dad while she browse through the letters that we had just received.
i still remember that picture, that atmosphere, that kind of contentment i have at that time and the peacefulness.

it's all gone.
it has been 4 years since i graduated from primary school.
since i stopped waiting at that particular spot.

my neighbour had recently passed away.
and that motorcycle is gone too.
i'll never see them again.

it has been very long since i did that with my mum.
i dont know when'll be the next time.
or shall i wonder, will there be a next time?

i know what im writing here is a bit too heavy.
but as what my cousin had told me earlier,
the feeling of nostalgia is back.

i miss the people who once brought smiles and laughter and warmth to me.
you all make me feel like im worth living.
thank you.

to a lot of people, i would just like to say,
有你真好。

kay, time to wrap out all the feelings.
back to the lecture notes and tutorials.
that's all that revolves around me everyday now.
i dont know if i can make it.
i hope i can.
i pray that i can.
i'll try.

oh yeah, happy valentines(:

2011-01-30T19:32:00.000+08:00

got a bit scewed up with the selection of subject combi
hope it's just a bit.
and today, i realised im not that strong afterall.
i really hate obstructions in my life
especially when at 1st, i thought everything will go as i had planned and proceed on smoothly
then i realised it cannot.
i will then go very stressed and worried.
hoping that someone could quickly come to my help
im not an independent person, and i dont want to be):
is there really someone whom i can dependent on for life?...

on the 1st day when i reported to school, my mum told me, "jc now. you had grown up, must be independent lerh."
and today when i faced difficulty and went super freaked out, she told me, "why are you so scared and worried? there'll always be a way out in the end anyway."
my mum is someone with guts, and i really admire that part of her sometimes.

rain rain go away~~ raining non-stop these 3 days.
dunno why the sky can contain so many water:S

2011-01-26T16:45:00.000+08:00

i love the happy kitty especially<3
school's starting tmr.
hope everything will turn out fine(:

2011-01-25T09:57:00.001+08:00

yes, i totally agree with the words in this picture.
sort of funny yeah?
people just walk in and out of our lives non-stop
and most of the time, we couldnt control it.
i really dont know if it's good to consider this fact as sad.
this is reality, again. -.-

sorry, im having some pre-school fear, as usual.
2 more days...

2011-01-22T19:09:00.002+08:00

another sad news that made today a depressing day.
haiiiiiiiiiii.

2011-01-20T19:06:00.002+08:00

kay, i realised i didnt have a proper bid 2010 goodbye post.
so i shall do 1 now(:

2010, important year indeed.
the Os year.
the final year in fuhua.
the end of my secondary school life.

a rather peaceful year as compared to 2009(i think?)

kay, i will definitely miss..
that ulu classroom,
all that crazy classmates,
all that fun schoolmates,
that nice seat (a lot),
that 2 cute partners (especially),
all that teachers,
all that tiring remedials,
that rubbish 4.30pm system,
that forever-cannot-be-finished homework pile,
all that interesting lessons,
all that funny jokes,
all that precious moments,

and lastly,

(although i always thought i wouldnt say this), that school.

yes, it isnt easy to walk through the whole year and to this point that i am right now.
but with all of them, i did it.

i always tell people that i probably wouldnt step into jurong again after i graduated,
but today, when the bus drove past fuhua again,
i couldnt help but to direct my attention to that particular building again.
that building,
rather basic and small,
managed to contain and witness all the memorable times i had the past 4 years.
i still remember the 1st day i stepped into it and decided to spend my next 4 years there.
4 years had past, it saw me growing up day after day.

fate has brought me to fuhua, and now it's bringing me to another school.
it's impossible to forget you, so dont worry(:

2011-01-19T14:46:00.002+08:00

Life's short.

今天的我，不开心，难过。

2011-01-11T13:25:00.001+08:00

“You are the only real obstacle in your path to a fulfilling life.”
ya luh, true.

this picture looks encouraging..
i hope i can convince myself to do that, seriously.

it has been very long since i posted.
busy with work.
and yeah, it's not as easy as i thought it will be.
not a very pleasant one month, but indeed, i learnt a lot, and know a lot.
got my very 1st official pay(:

got back the results.
1st reaction: oh..okay luh, better than the 18 points that my mum dreamt of me getting and the 16 points i think i will get.
2nd reaction: 5 a2s, can seriously do better [ regrets): ]
my mum is all the while encouraging me that it's good.
kay luh, it's not bad.. can do better.

to someone, reading your blog makes me hopeful again suddenly.

告诉我，我现在该去哪？...

2010-12-05T00:23:00.001+08:00

happy birthday.
but so not happy now):
feel like crying somemore.
haii)':

2010-12-04T09:05:00.002+08:00

this is so not easy as it seems to be.
lady luck is playing a trick on me.
i hope someone will give me the courage to continue holding on there.

it just doesnt feel good to be working all the way till 10pm on my 16th birthday.
this is post Os period and supposingly the relax period but im slogging my life out there)':
hopefully, real good sales result will be my birthday present for the day.
please.

2010-11-27T09:20:00.001+08:00

i realised that stress dont just come from studies.
i think my stress level havent really gone down after Os
omg i hate the feeling of uncertainty
currently spamming myself with the phrase, "船到桥头自然直"

dont worry, shi ting's still a happy kid(:

2010-11-24T19:51:00.003+08:00

it's starting to get screwed up again.

im not going to let it back to haunt me again.
No, ever.

2010-11-16T10:28:00.000+08:00

had a very weird feeling yesterday.
it's sort of a mixture of shiokness and unbelievable
cant believe the monster "olevels" is gone.
for the past 2 years, all of us have been haunted by him.
i can still remember the teachers are always saying, "we're looking at OLEVELS"
in a blink of a eye, it's here.
and in another blink, it's gone.
that's the power of time.

i cannot imagine how much time i spent on the never seems ending homework and tests..
how much time the teachers spent scolding us.
i think i will always remember the scene of 4E5 pushing out our chairs and standing up together once the examiner said "all the best for your results. hope you'll enjoy your holidays. you may go now."
all the cheering and smiles on our faces as we walked out of the hall.

It's just so sudden you see.
you know, normally when I'm watching tv or using com, sometimes part of me have this little bit of guilty.
then i'll start recalling what homework i have not done yet.
and yst, i got this feeling again, i think it's a habit already after 2 full years, lol.
okay, and then, suddenly i realised, i really got absolutely no more work to do anymore!
then i go, "oh ya.." and gives myself a knock on the head.
yeah, i think i'll need some time to adapt this particularly special type of sense of loss, LOL>.<

someone said this to me, "This is the way life is. People walk in and out no matter how good they have once been. What's important is their footprints that they had left in our lives. Let's not be sad, because what's important is that we had shared happy and memorable times together. If life could start over again, I wouldn't change anything, because it's my fate. Meeting you is also part of my fate."

okay, i changed some parts, but the content is roughly like that.
anyway the whole main point is that every people whom we came across in our lives, it's our fate to meet them. It's certainly not by chance or coincidence. Can you like get it? 6 billion people on this earth and i met you. So let's cherish this fate that we shared together kay?(:

I believe for many of us, our fate together are nearing the end.
we may not even ever meet again once we leave fuhua.
maybe very quickly, we will forget one another.
but anyway, thank you for entering my life(:
i believe every individual whom i meet makes a difference to me.

kay since there's no jobs available for me at the moment, i shall first enjoy my post Olevels period then(:
so sad im broke)':

2010-11-12T19:04:00.000+08:00

feeling so bored suddenly.
need to start planning my holidays.