“1. push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise.
2. push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable.
3. erase processed food from your diet. start with no lollies, chips, biscuits, then erase pasta, rice, cereal, then bread. use the rule that if a child couldn’t identify what was in it, you don’t eat it.
4. get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else.
5. stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything.
6. buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice.
7. buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small.
8. strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full.
9. organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle.
10. have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck.
11. push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog.
12. message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through.
14. think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything.
15. become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends.
16. lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.”
A lot of thoughts run through my mind recently.
School's starting next week.
As much as how I'm excited about it in the past months, now I actually do hope that it don't ever come.
Meeting new people, starting a brand new routine, beginning a new challenge.. Definitely not my forte.
I'm so used to my own little circle now that I'm afraid to step out of it once again.
It has been exactly one week after my surgery.
The biopsy result turned out to be fine and I'm well on the track of recovery.
Can't do any exercise yet though (I actually hates it).
I don't like the feeling of being cooped at home, with my eyes glued to the laptop and iPhone screen (even though I do it 90% of the time).
A lot of people might be surprised, that I actually enjoy sweating under the sun(not the afternoon sun though) and loosening up all my muscles and joints, or going somewhere for a walk with the family.
I think that helps a lot in clearing up all the unwanted thoughts in my little brain so that I can smile once again.
Really hate the pessimistic and introvert side of me.
Really hate all those people who judge me as being proud and dao and whatsoever.
Okay, I know it's my fault at the end of the day, people judge by how you act in front of them after all.
They can never understand the feeling when you really wish to join in the conversation but you actually don't know how to.
Yeah, that's our line of difference.
I still believe it's in the genes.
Yeah, I can't sweat out all my troubles at the moment due to physical constraints, that's explains why I'm here writing all these out now.
Feeling so much better now.
I'll try my best to be lively again!
I know I can, because I did.
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